Stan Hollibaugh ·
16m ·
Time to fix this
Okay, we don't know who you are, but if you read this, you will. One amongst us made a grave error, an innocent error, that has had serious consequences.
Now is the time to own up and do whatever is necessary to make it right again.
I've figured it out. I don't have the exact details, but it went down something like this.
It was the night before the Iowa game. Maybe you were at the middle urinal at the airliner or having a Gyro by the Three Ladies Pissing Statue. Maybe you were at your Hawkeye in-laws house sleeping in the guest room with a Herky clock on the wall at midnight. I don't know for sure, but one of those Jumanji or 80s movie where two people switch bodies things happened. You said something like, "I would rather go winless in the Big XII than lose to Iowa." We know you didn't really mean it, but when you looked straight at the Tiger Hawk or that Goth wannabee in the Ped Mall, it happened. Your wish came true and the cosmic forces were disrupted.
We all know that sinister forces are at work here. Our one good win this year is to Iowa. Normally, that would be a good win, but they have the worst offense in all of Power 5 football.
Before that game, before you accidently uttered that incantation while the big Herky wing and the little Herky wing touched on the 12, we had a decent running game along with a great D and a promising young QB. Now we have a win over Iowa and a lot of disappointment.
It's time to fix this. Whatever it takes. Whatever! Maybe you have to tell your father-in-law that Herky sucks. Maybe you need to run through the Ped Mall naked. I don't know. But it's time to reverse that Herky curse and get back to Iowa State football.
For the rest of us, we need to do our part. Wear your lucky Cyclone socks or undies or the ugly Cy shirt that your mother-in-law bought you even though she is an Iowa grad. Whatever it takes. I don't know, but we need to have another big Win against Oklahoma like we did when the unlikeliest of heroes, Kyle Kempt, led us to victory and began a new era of Cyclone football.
Let's Do It.
55