I live in Denver and have a 13 month old daughter with an ex-girlfriend. We have a pretty good relationship, have agreed to try and be reasonable and amicable during this process, and try not to involve lawyers and just be good parents and do what's in the best interest of the daughter. So far so good. We drew up a parenting agreement that we both agreed to, agreed to child support amount... no lawyers or courts involved.
The agreement is intentionally vague on some items, like she can start traveling with just me either at 18 months, or when done breastfeeding (which is still happening).
I am supposed to get her for Thanksgiving this year. I asked if I could bring her back to Iowa for 2-3 days to meet a ton of extended family (including little kid cousins) she has never met, her grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc. It would be great.
The ex is saying a 17 month old (at that time) leaving a breastfeeding mom for 2-3 days would be traumatizing for the kid, she would feel abandoned, confused, etc. so is saying no. You can google research and find both sides to this argument.
Every single person I've talked to has said a reasonable person would be fine with her going home with dad over Thanksgiving. Parents travel all the time for work, business, etc. for longer than 2-3 days, and kids are fine. She's never been apart from this child for one night (thus far), and it's mostly due to breastfeeding a couple times a night.
Of course I could take breastmilk and feed her, and she's taking whole milk and normal food now too. Bottom line, I think everything would be fine and she would not be emotionally scarred or feel abandoned. I called our pediatrician secretly, and she agrees with me. But my ex says for every doctor that agrees, she could find one that disagrees.
Any thoughts out there? Anyone been in a similar situation? I am not sure what to do, call a lawyer, get a mediation, just concede this year (and have my parents and family come out, which is expensive), and take her back next year?
I guess I'm just annoyed she thinks she's always right, and there's nothing I can do without getting a lawyer or spending a bunch of money on fees, court costs, etc.
The agreement is intentionally vague on some items, like she can start traveling with just me either at 18 months, or when done breastfeeding (which is still happening).
I am supposed to get her for Thanksgiving this year. I asked if I could bring her back to Iowa for 2-3 days to meet a ton of extended family (including little kid cousins) she has never met, her grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc. It would be great.
The ex is saying a 17 month old (at that time) leaving a breastfeeding mom for 2-3 days would be traumatizing for the kid, she would feel abandoned, confused, etc. so is saying no. You can google research and find both sides to this argument.
Every single person I've talked to has said a reasonable person would be fine with her going home with dad over Thanksgiving. Parents travel all the time for work, business, etc. for longer than 2-3 days, and kids are fine. She's never been apart from this child for one night (thus far), and it's mostly due to breastfeeding a couple times a night.
Of course I could take breastmilk and feed her, and she's taking whole milk and normal food now too. Bottom line, I think everything would be fine and she would not be emotionally scarred or feel abandoned. I called our pediatrician secretly, and she agrees with me. But my ex says for every doctor that agrees, she could find one that disagrees.
Any thoughts out there? Anyone been in a similar situation? I am not sure what to do, call a lawyer, get a mediation, just concede this year (and have my parents and family come out, which is expensive), and take her back next year?
I guess I'm just annoyed she thinks she's always right, and there's nothing I can do without getting a lawyer or spending a bunch of money on fees, court costs, etc.
